Poolroom innuendo

Poolroom innuendo

Let’s face it… pool is a sexy game. There’s a lot of bending at the waist, leaning over the table and contorting into a variety of positions just to make your shot. And, as you might imagine, there’s an awful lot of innuendo flying around the poolroom. So let the puns begin!

We take cleanliness very seriously at KSB and rarely does a day go by where someone doesn’t comment on my “clean balls” or my “shiny balls” or ask “how much time do to spend polishing your balls?”. Too much time, I’m afraid. I go through a lot of ball cleaner. I also have a machine that helps.

Before the game starts, players remove their stick from the case and most take a few moments to polish the shaft with a shaft slicker. Some are very quick about it while others take their time, inspecting every inch and making sure the wood is smooth, slick and blemish free. You want to be sure it slides easily between your fingers. Some people wear a glove to lessen the friction.

Of course, there are players who don’t own their own cue and search the room for a nice, straight shaft. When you find a stick you like be sure to check the grip and the butt, as well. Some players like a long stick while others are content with a shorter one. Whatever your preference, it’s important to find one with a nicely shaped tip.

Occasionally, after playing for a while, you’ll hear someone lamenting his balls are sticky. Or, during a game of 8-ball, as in life, he wants the high-balls but ends up with the low balls. Sometimes, you can’t sink any balls because the pockets are too tight. And, of course, the game plays better after you get felt on the table.

Additionally, pool players are always looking for a nice rack so, when they break, they can sink a couple of balls. A tight rack is best. Just make sure the balls are touching.

Some guys spend the whole game wishing for just a few more inches on the leave so they can sink the next shot. Some folks play too hard. They need to ease up a bit because they’re hammering the balls or slamming  balls into the pocket. Yikes.

As far as innuendo goes, pool can never compete with football with their wide receivers, tight-ends and “going deep”. Fortunately for me, most of our players have a mature attitude about the sport of pool and don’t participate in such childish antics. Actually, maybe it’s just me. Heh-heh. Balls.

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